No, I'm kidding. Well, I'm not, they are orange and yellow (respectively), but I'm not going to write about those obvious observations. Though I guess I just did. Darn.
Anyways. I sat here spinning in my spinny chair (computer chair? are they called computer chairs?), trying to think some thinks about that I may want to write about for my first non-introductory blog post, and I thought, well, why not
To put it simply, I'm probably just going to complain. Let's make a list, shall we.
Okay, fine, I'll make the list, you can just read it. Fair enough? Gosh, it's like being the one kid in the group in class who has to do all the work, you slackers.
(Sometimes I forget I'm talking to potentially no one, and I get a little chatty, my bad).
So here we go.
#1: Kids these days
Oh look at that, I've gone and made myself sound like I'm 70 already, that didn't take long. I'm not, by the way. 70, that is. I just sound like and have the back pain of a 70 year old, but that's neither here nor there.
So yeah, kids these days. As a 20 year old, I can barely count myself out of those woods known as 'teen years', but I'm counting every single one of those steps I've taken out from under the dark canopy of those years and I am counting them but good.
Whatever that actually means.
All I seem to see lately are these little teeny-boppers, these 12-15 year old kiddos, trying to grow up fast as possible. And yeah, sure, we were all like that at some point. We all wanted to be cool adults, and drive cars and have cool astronaut/doctor/police officer jobs--hell, some of us just wanted to be celebrities and live the easy life, nothing wrong with that. But I don't mean that. I mean these little 12 year old kids wanting to have sex and boyfriends/girlfriends and 'the D' (oh lord); talking about 'getting high' and 'drankin' and whatever.
Maybe I'm old fashioned, but, the way I see it, if you're 12, you should still be watching Powerpuff Girls/Power Rangers (or whatever the new cartoon is, they're all subpar nowadays [with the exception of a few, like Spongebob, oh yeah] anyways), rolling in mud puddles, and thinking the opposite sex is still kind of gross.
Not taking pictures of you and your friends holding coolers and giving the world the finger.
You're 12, come on. Little do you know, one day you're going to wish you could be 12 again, just so you can crawl under the bed and stay there for a few hours, because, jesus, being an adult? Ain't so great.
I mean, yeah, you get to drive. That's pretty awesome. But you know what else it is?
Expensive as heck. Overall, I've owned two vehicles, both of which I bought for under $2000, and I've still spent more money than I even care to calculate on the damn things--mostly just on gas!
And then bills, oh lord, it never ends.
But anyways. Like I said, maybe I'm old-fashioned (and I am, I'll admit it), but I know if I had a 12 year old kid, I sure as hell wouldn't want them tweeting about 'gettin krunk'. Because, jeez, man.
And another thing. The mouths on kids these days. I'm not saying I'm not guilty of dropping an F-bomb--hell, I can be as foul-mouthed as anyone, but I understand that there is a time and a place.
Example: I worked two years, off and on, as a cashier. And, yeah, it's not a glamorous job, not by a long shot. It made money, and that was it. But I was good at it. And I knew what image to present.
And that image was not of a foul-mouthed, lack-luster, lazy ass slouched over the till, wearing a snapback, spitting tobacco chew into the garbage, and dropping the F word every few sentences. But that's what I see, all the time. I know it's not a great job, I know you hate it (I hated it, I understand), but, for god sakes, at least look like you're not completely useless, yeah?
And yesterday! I drove around a corner, and these kids were walking in the middle of my lane. There was a truck coming in the other direction, so I couldn't just go around them. I honked (twice, in that friendly beep-beep way, not a rude blare, come on now), and one of these kids, she turned around, gave me the finger, and I clearly saw her mouth make that all too familiar F word shape.
Because I honked so they would realize there was a car behind them.
Well gosh, maybe next time I should just run you over, would that be better for you?
Wow, feels good to get that one out.
#2: Rest in Peace, proper English grammar
Or, as I so painfully often get to read, there their, oh lord.
It would seem that grammar dies more and more every day. Maybe it's just me. Not to say that I don't make typos, and confuse your/you're, there/their/they're etc when I'm falling asleep over my phone, and my punctuation is dodgy at times (I'm having a love affair with the semi-colon, but you didn't hear it from me, capice?) but come on.
Come on.
In grade 12, I peer tutored a grade 9 English class with my friend. Our duties included going around and giving help if anyone needed it, copying/printing worksheets, and, on occasion, marking said worksheets for the teacher.
One thing you should know about me. If you mess up grammar, and I believe you should, by all means, know this grammar, I will not go easy on you.
Oh, the red marks on those worksheets. Those poor kids probably had nightmares for weeks; red was probably all they saw. I bet they hated me with a burning passion much the same colour as the ink in my unforgiving red pen.
But it gets worse. Adults. Adults writing like elementary students. Adults who can't spell, and to whom, apparently, the word 'you're' is non-existent.
Now I'm not knocking anyone who has a disability in this area, is intellectually challenged, or speaks English as a second language. No no no, that's fine, I've no problem with people who have legitimate cause for not knowing proper grammar/spelling. And I'm not knocking the slip-ups that happen to everyone of us from time to time.
But I cannot stand ignorance. My parents tease me while I fume on the couch and rant over the unbearably slaughtered version of the English language people use in Facebook groups, but it is very much a bother to me.
I actually can't think of anything else at the moment (which is a good thing, because holy cow, do I ever complain a lot), so I think I'll leave it at that for now.
Not much of a list, but ehhhhhh, what'chya gonna do.
